Listen with EMPATHY!

1.  Identify the emotion.
2.   Set an intention for listening.
3.  Listen with empathy.
4.  Respond with empathy.

Are you Empathetic? What does that even mean?




  1. Showing an ability to understand and share the feelings of another.


Quizzing : “Did you do what I told you to do?” “Did you take the medicine when you were supposed to? Judging or Guilting : “Why did you do that?” “That doesn’t seem worth worrying about.” Well, that was a dumb thing to do. “I can’t believe you did that!” “I told you this is what would happen.” Advising or Fixing : “You shouldn’t have said that.” “You should have taken the medicine like you were supposed to. “Maybe you should . . .” Placating : “Oh, well, tomorrow is a new day.” “That’s not so bad.” Denying or Discounting : “I can’t believe you’re upset about that.” “That’s nothing!” “Shouldn’t you just be glad that you have a job?”

One-upping or Kidnapping the empathy: “If you think that’s bad . . .” “You should hear what happened to me!” Educating : “There’s a good book you should read about that.” Analyzing : “This seems to happen to you a lot.” Consoling : “That’s too bad. I’m sure tomorrow things will go better.’ In response to someone saying, “I’m so tired, I couldn’t get any work done.” One-upping “I’m so tired myself. I couldn’t get any work done either.”

Wondering, what do you mean by “empathy”?

Read through the scenarios below and see if you can tell what’s missing or what IS there?

What do you think you would have done if you were in a similar situation?

The International Day of Listening is strongly backed by an enormous base of knowledge, The International Listening Association. Since 1979 ILA founders and members have been totally dedicated to advocating that listening skills are the key to becoming better humans and building a better civilization together.

The International Listening Association (ILA) is a professional organization consisting of a network of people committed to the development of effective listening in professional and personal lives. We are involved in listening in education, business, healthcare, hospitality, music and many other fields. We promote the study of listening, exchange information and pursue research into the ways in which listening can develop understanding in our personal, political, social and working lives. The International Listening Association serves as a dialogue space, a resource network, a news source and an international community – our members are working in more than 19 countries across the globe.

For more information about the International Listening Association visit: www.listen.org